Daily Archives: May 13, 2012

A Mother’s Confession

I see no reason, why mothers day has to be celebrated on a particular day.

Isn’t everyday a mother’s day? Do mothers stop being mothers on other days?

Well I guess, its too late to discuss it now 🙂

Every day is a Mothers day

The celebrations and mentions of mothers all around, accidentally reminded me of my mother (yea almost accidentally, coz  I was never close to her).

As a teen, I was always close to my dad. Mum always remarked, we were the same breed – selfish and arrogant (and ungrateful too, but she never said that).

And I used to take proud in being so, I was daddy’s girl, spoilt and happy !!

She was the one, who wasn’t very well-educated and married off at a tender age. I know it wasn’t her fault, but that always made me look down upon her as a parent who wasn’t contributing to her child’s studies. Although she was the best at whatever she did.

Her primary function being, cooking and taking care of her family with three kids. She was always over-powered and over-shadowed by her husband (my dad), and I never realised she was being neglected. She had never complained.

She couldn’t help us to study, but took care that we finished our homework on time, submitted our projects, arranged our bags, learnt our lessons for the test, ate well and slept on time. Nothing had deterred her dedication as a loving mother who never expected anything in return. Anything she said in terms of discipline was counted as nagging.

Fast forward to present, when I am a mother myself, I realise how wrong I had been.

Although she had never sat down to teach me how to do a tricky calculation, she taught me the lessons of life. She taught me how could I be a good mother to my kids.

The dedication I possess is only a fraction of hers and I still have a long way to go. The thing that troubles me is that I could never really thank her for whatever she had done for me, may be due to my ignorance then. Neither did she expect me to do so, nor was I mature enough that time to express it. May be there was a communication gap.

She was sure the back bone of the family. If it wasn’t her perseverance, dad would not have been able to focus the way he did on building our careers. Just because he was more vocal and expressive, and she was reserved and submissive, he got more of the spotlight.

As a mother myself now, I always take care my kids talk enough to me. I try to be their friend in deeds and needs both. And it pains sometimes to see  how they consider the disciplinary issues as a usual nagging of mothers.

I feel its kinda tit for tat for me 🙂 I never ignore it though. At times I try to change myself, and at other times try to mould them into a more decent behaviour (which isn’t easy of course)

When I look back, I realise, mum was always there with me. Not even once had she left my side or stopped loving me. Be it my first day to the school, my board examinations, my first periods, or the birth of my children. She was a support and a pillar of strength for me.

Only if she could read this post, or I gather enough courage to go up to her, hug her and say – Sorry mum, I underestimated you………..